I haven't blogged in a while, I guess I have been busy or something. Or my Clutch in my car might have gone out, and so all my energy was put towards figuring out how to get that fixed without a lot of money.
Today, is one of those days, maybe ones of those weeks actually where you are like Hi, my name is Whoa, and I feel all terrible for myself, but yet I havent really done anything to change it.
Yeah, this weeks that week.
Do you ever feel like you reallly reallllllly reallllllllly have something thats bothering you, and for whatever reason this thing gets like pushed off to the side, or shit gets better for a minute so you kinda forget about it, but then something else happens and it like cuts the wound a little deeper, and it hurts a little more because its already a sorta-healed wound? Thats the way I feel. I feel like there is some stuff thats really fucking bothering me, and I cant talk about it because I know what will happen if I do. And to completely avoid that, I just think about it, and after time.. thinking about it drives you fucking crazy.
This week has been made up of wine, weed, xanex, and valium, and a fucking car with a broken clutch.
yeah yeah, im thankful I've got a house, and a job.. (I'm living the fucking dream right) but sometimes why cant people realize whats right in the fuckin stupid faces, and buck the fuck up and claim whats theirs, and love it, and appreciate it, and do what people do when they live in the real fucking world with real fucking people with feelings (sorry for all the f bombs)
Is it really better out there somewhere doing others things, with other people.. I think right here is the place to be, and Im living it up.
Cheers to making me feel let a wet fucking blanket, on a sunny fucking day that I was throughly enjoying until you slapped me across the face and made me open my eyes to what I was REALLY looking at all along. Bravo Buddy, Bra-fucking-Vo.
Words of wisdom:
If there is something you care about, Tell it or them now. right now, today. Everyday.
If you have money, dont be a tidewod, spend it sometimes.
And if you have a good person in front of you that loves you. hold on to them pretty darn tight, or they might just float right the fuck away, and be like boooo ya, shoulda held on tighter bitch. And you'll probably regret it and feel like a schmuck bucket, and realized the best thing you had in your life, YOU let Go.
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